Dreamer

Hello dreamers and happy Monday!

For the last few months or even for a year now, I feel like most of my friendships have gone south. But it’s especially one that really bothers me, cause I get it, with time passing we change and we have different perspectives of life, different priorities, different opinions, and different schedules.

With most of my friends, I don’t have a problem with not talking on a regular basis, but what do we do when it comes to the friends we call family?

Cause there it hurts! It hurts me to think that people I would’ve thought as siblings are going further and further away from me.

I know I’m not perfect, and I don’t expect people to gravitate around me every second of the day. But I do expect a call from time to time. Or at least I expect not to feel like a total stranger when I try to re-bond.

I expect honesty. And when the usual excuse is the lack of time and how tired you are, how am I supposed to feel when I see that that tiredness and lack of time isn’t as big of a deal when it comes to other people?

I know I feel betrayed. I know I feel like all the tears I wiped, all the crises I managed were in vain..

But why should I feel like I haven’t done enough when I know it’s one of the most selfless relationships I have ever been into?

I thought that at least the best news, the ones that I knew how much you prayed for, those at least you would share with me, and that I wouldn’t find out like the rest of the world via Facebook stories.

But yeah, as time passes, we grow old apart, not together, and as I survived the previous time, I will survive now.

I could let my wild side win and have a guess of how it’s actually a way of hiding the mask you wear from someone who actually sees and knows you. It’s easier to pretend when people don’t know your real colors, and probably it’s easier to fake it till you make it this way.

Sadly, almost a decade of friendship is reduced to … nothing. But life goes on, with friendships or not.

And no matter what, it’s #adreamerlife!

Cristiana Apreutese